Thanks to big demand of puns, I have decided to share my pun collection with you. They are from various reddit comments or the official forums or just found through googling "FFXIV puns". This are not mine!
Here they are:
Primals
What does Ifrit eat for breakfast? A bowl of embers
What did Ifrit say after he wiped the party? Nailed it!
Why did Ifrit go to the salon? To get his nails done.
What do primals do when they're cold? They Shiva!
Why do the other primals not invite Odin to their slumber parties? They don't want to Sleipnir him.
What's Titan's favourite time of year? Fall
What's Twintania's favorite party game? Twister.
Who is the meanest primal? Ga-rude-a!
What's Nidhogg's favorite food? Hot wings
What's Sophia's favorite job? Warrior, because she found Equilibrium on the hotbar.
Lalafell
Why are Lalafell the nicest people you will find? Because it's hard for them to look down on someone.
Why don't Lalafell make good culinarians? The steaks are to high
Why was the Lala crying? She fell.
What do you call a Lalafell psychic wanted by the guards in Uldah? A small medium at large.
What did the Lalafell say when asked for a few gil? Sorry, I'm a little short!
What do you call a chubby lalafell? Low fat.
What gesture does a lalafell use to say hello? A microwave!
Where do lalafell go to drink? The mini-bar!
What happens when a lalafell gets too fat for her clothes? They Titan
What's the difference between a lalafell and a rolanberry pie? The pie doesn't scream when baked in the oven.
What do you call a poor Lala? A little short.
What do you call your FC leader if he's a lalafell? The Underlord
Other Races
What do you call a roegadyn gilspammer? A Roebot!
Moogles
Why should you bring a moogle with you when you go shopping? Kupons
Summoner
Why are Summoners not welcome in most groups? Because they ruin everything. But Scholars Ruin II.
Why do famous people get summoners to write about them? Because they write the best biographies.
Scholar
Why do Scholars make good gardeners? Because they always work with Sacred Soil
Why wouldn't Selene listen to the Scholar? Because she was feeling sic
I'm a real succor for Scholar puns
I could Embrace you for this
What did the Scholar say to the White Mage when the Scholar rolled higher on a piece of loot? Succor!
Why does everyone love having Scholars at their parties? Because they always bring PIE.
What's it called when a scholar and a monk get into a fight? A succor punch.
White Mage
Why don't you want a White Mage for a doctor? Because they put everyone in the Asylum.
What type of shoes do white mages wear? Heals.
Why should you never debate with a WHM? Because they always raise good points.
Astrologian
AST puns? I don't think you grasp the Gravity of the situation. Don't Combust reading these. Maybe you'll Ascend to my level someday. You and your puns lack some Essential Dignity. I think they are Stella myself. Give me the Benefic of the doubt at least. Even if I had Celestial Opposition I wouldn't stop these puns.
Dragoon
A Dragoon walks into a bar. The rest of the party dodges.
Dragoon goes up to his boss and asks for a raise.
Why do Dragoons make bad detectives? Because they always Jump to conclusions.
How do you drown a dragoon? Put an AOE circle at the bottom of the ocean
How do you know your child is going to grow up to be a dragoon? It's all in how you raise them.
Black Mage
How do you know BLM is the manliest job? Won the manaward.
Why do Blm make bad Bosses? They Fire everyone.
What is the difference between a black mage and a glamour? Glamours have more flare!
What did the voidsent say to the black mage? Dun Scaith me, bro!
Tanks
FC mate asks a warrior how he felt about grinding the 200 dungeons for the mount. "It was unbearable" His pld friend looks over on overhearing the conversation. "You ain't lion."
What do you call a WAR that doesn't pop cooldowns? Holmgone. Emp: an EA applicant
Why was the tank arrested? For Flashing in public!
What do you call a WAR looking to partner up with a NIN? A Goad-digger.
What's a DRK's favorite anime? Souleater
Ninja
It's dangerous to Goad alone, take this!
A NIN is never late. They always arrive Raiton time.
That's Goad to know.
What do you call a WAR looking to partner up with a NIN? A Goad-digger.
Did you know Ninjas are known for their graffiti? They Raiton everything!
What shoes do Ninjas wear? Sneakers
Why could only the Ninja ride the bicycle? It was dual-wheeled.
Monk
What's a Monk's favorite song? Greased Lightning
What was the monk doing counting fish? Making a Pugil list
What's it called when a scholar and a monk get into a fight? A succor punch.
Why are Pugilist jokes so funny? They have a strong punchline.
Gatherers / Crafters
What did the doctor say to the carpenter? "Stop sending me all these stool samples."
Why does the Fisher have no friends? He mooches
Alexander Raid
Almost got shafted. Good thing I managed to spring that shaft. Looted that thing and bolted. Would've gotten cranky otherwise. Yeah, wouldn't want that extra negativity on my plate. You just need to look at it through a new lense. I think we're out of items to pun with so I'm going to end this chain here.
Other
Why do dragons/Au Ra detest level syncs? They don't like to be scaled down.
Why did the S rank dragon go on a diet? Because she was Safat
Why wouldn't Cid use steel? Cause Iron Works.
How do the citizens of Eorzea connect to the Internet? Garlean Fiber
Many adventurers lost blood in the Battle of Carteneau. Doctors tried their best to save them, but they needed Mor Dhonas.
What happened when the waitress tripped at Eorzea Cafe? The server went down.
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